Sunday, June 12, 2011

What I Have That 'They' Don't.

What I have that they don't...... (and by 'they', I am talking about those lovely, often-smug pregnant and new mom friends of mine).  Yup.  I realize this is lame considering that I want more than anything to have what they have.... considering that I am about to pay thousands upon thousands of dollars just to have a 36% chance of getting what they have)....but, hey, pretending for a minute in order to cheer yourself up isn't the worst thing in the world, is it?.... And so...

What I have that they don't have.... in no particular order.

1.  Random napping.
2.  Glorious weekend sleep-ins
3.  Uninterupted nights filled with sleep.
4.  No need to repeatedly watch Dora and her exciting adventures.
5.  A stretch mark-free belly.
6.  Breasts that do not resemble flaccid condoms.
7.  A lifetime free of worrying about purchasing birth control.
8.  A DH that will never have to get himself snipped.
9.  Double income with no daycare expenses.
10.  Unlimited access to afternoon and evening outings with no concern about finding a babysitter
11.  Conversations about topics other than poo, diapers, breastfeeding and being tired.
12. A facebook profile picture that is actually my own face.
13. Unlimited access to photos of my ovarian functioning.

Ahhh...........  Life is good  (told you that there's nothing wrong with pretending...........)



  1. Naps....over talking about's my favorite...NOT.

    I agree, we may not have it all but we are blessed with what do have!!!

  2. Hahaha, "flaccid condom" breasts. I've seen them but never known quite how to describe them. P.S. I hope we both get flaccid condom boobs soon.

  3. Love this post! I have to stop myself sometimes from rubbing it in to my mommy friends that we can travel and nap anytime we want - when all I really want is to be like them.

  4. Love love love your list!

    You gotta add beer to your list. A cold one, anytime I want it!